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Muppets in Love: Miss Piggy & ???


Now that Kermit and Miss Piggy are splitsville, the question remains: who will the Porcine Diva choose for her new paramour? There are a number of eligible, available Muppets to choose from, but which is right for her? Let's consider the possibilities:


Piggy has never had a very high tolerance for Gonzo and his unique brand of weirdness. Besides, he prefers chicken to pork.


Fozzie Bear is exactly the kind of sad sack others love to take advantage of. A strong personality like Miss Piggy will not just walk all over him, but she'll do it in stiletto heels. No, she needs someone with more backbone.


Now, Rowf is nobody's fool; you can't imagine him as a doormat, even to his girlfriend. But he strikes one as too smart a cookie to get into a relationship with a volatile pig in the first place.


Rizzo the Rat's urban trash talk and general squalor rule him out. Miss Piggy prefers at least a degree of sophistication in her men.


The several members of the Electric Mayhem are too apt to mock Miss Piggy to have any romantic interest in her, even if she was attracted to one of them. Which is highly doubtful.


Bunsen Honeydew and Sam the Eagle are far too wrapped up in their own pursuits to give any thought to relationships, at least not with someone outside their own spheres. The professor is in love with science, and Sam with his American dream, and there is little room in either's life for a pig with ideas of her own.


Too young...


Too old...

After considering all the options, we conclude that Miss Piggy's best match is:
Pepe the King Prawn. Not much in the looks department, perhaps, but he possesses a level of sophistication and taste that Piggy would find appealing. His accent lends him a touch of international charm that would not be lost on her. We proclaim him worthy to be Miss Piggy's next beau.

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